Sunday, June 1, 2008

The Professional - if Pooped - Poetess

Finally back home in Chattanooga after what feels like too long away. I have to admit I'm a bit of an introvert, despite my bubbly and funny social persona when I'm in a group, and being around so many people for so long has me exhausted. A colleague picked me up from the airport (thanks, Bevvie!), and dropped me at home, where I promptly did laundry, groceried, and scrubbed down the bathroom and decreased the height of a few piles of 'stuff.' All in all, relatively productive. And while I am not in the least looking forward to meeting the trainer at 8am tomorrow, I am indeed looking forward to rescuing my basset boy from the animal hospital where he's been boarding. I missed his furry little butt - he would have come in handy at the hotel, which was positively frigid. And I do love a cold room, but it's easier to fall asleep with a pupster bundled up behind your knees.


Anyway, home and looking forward to Getting Sh*t Done for the next few weeks at work. Very pleased to report that this afternoon when I got home and checked my email, I found one that included a contract from Familia Books, who picked up my poem "crochet" for their forthcoming anthology Wisdom of Our Mothers. (Please note that the contract also noted that I could collect my $100 payment upon publication, or wait until a year after publication and collect $200. Either way, this is my first paid piece. The Peripatetic Poetess is now the Professional Poetess!)

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

MFA Residency: Day 5

Day 5 is just ending of the residency for my low-res MFA here at Spalding University in Louisville. A lot has happened so far, adn I'll cram as much as I can into this post before I feel the tug of poetry draw me back to my notebook.


I got in on Thursday night (after being completely raped by a Chattanooga cab company - $28 to take me one and a half miles to the airport! WHAT?! Mental note: call Beverly and beg a ride home from the airport on Sunday), and the Brown hotel is as beautiful as ever, and equipped with the same decadently absorbent towels. I love crossing back into Kentucky - even Louisville, though my heart is closer to Danville and Lexington. It always feels like coming home.


Residency started on Friday, and I amazed myself by remembering the map of Spalding's small downtown campus - I got myself turned around regularly in November, but now I'm pretty adept at getting around our little 4-block cube of the city, and its homeless folk. (Thanks for the catcalls, guys. Seriously. You have no idea how that makes the day of a big-bootied woman like myself. I heart the looeyville homeless!)


Coming here is really like coming home. As a writer, there's little better than finding an entire gaggle of people who understand your random frisking of yourself for a writing implement to jot down (on paper, or your bookbag strap, or your arm) a thought that you think might grow into a nifty little sapling of a poem or story. Folks who understand the devastation of those teensy little impersonal rejection slips that count as responses to your deepest secrets sent off to editors. Folks you don't feel guilty with when you press your latest pieces into their hands for workshopping, because you know they're really interested in your work, and you know you'll get honest and constructive feedback from. Smell that? That's beer mixed with artistic potential. Those stains? Ink. I love it.


So far, I have attended lectures on:


Pico Iyer's Sun After Dark: Flights into the Foreign, lyric essays on travel


Creative Non Fiction: Where the Public Meets the Private


The Life of the Place: Ko Un's Abiding Places


A Rhetorical Approach to the Sentence


There are No Zebras Among the Roses: Negation & the Imagination in 20th Century Poetry


The Art of Poetic Failure: Identification, Method & Practice


Metaphor as Analysis: Transparency, Translucence, Opacity in Language


the Shapely Poem


On Translation


Writing in Animal Time


The History of Every Country


Structural Screwity: A brief Guide to Reading & Writing Experimental Fiction


Sudden Physical Moments in Short Fiction


And we're not even done until Saturday night!


I've been workshopping daily with my small group and Greg Pape, who will also be my mentor for this upcoming semester. He's not only a hell of a poet with a real eye for the details in nature, he's also Montana's Poet Laureate and an all-around interesting guy with a really intense reading presence and a good sense of humor. (He's going to need it, with me as a student.)


Tomorrow I've got my small group discussion on syntactic doubling and line breaks, an expository writing workshop where we'll go over each other's critical essays (on a book we all hated, so that should be particularly painful), poetry workshop, a lecture on fiction for the book in common for this coming semester, and a play at the Bunbury Theater, Rabbit Hole.


All told, it's going pretty well, though not quite as gangbusters as last residency, when I seem to remember staying up until past 4am drinking beer (um, I do not even like beer), and there may have been an occasion or two where I raised my shirt above what was proper to show off some ink. So far it's been pretty tame, with folks quitting for bed before 10pm. I do hope that we end up hitting Fourth Street Live again sometime this residency, because the poetess desperately needs an excuse to shake her tucchus on the dance floor sometime in 2008. One more dance while I'm twenty-eight, before I turn the big two-nine next week.


Anyway, among the great workshopping and the notes I've made on lectures, I've also been hitting the student and faculty readings at night, which are really impressive. Last night I read "Love Letter from a White Woman," "Intercession" (a rewrite of the ail Mary prayer), "For my Unborn Son" and "Thorns," and they seemed to go over really well with the crowd. (It was getting on 9pm, so it is also altogether possible the crowd was simply pleased to be getting out, since I was the last reader.) Anyway, it was a good time, and I was re-impressed with the crop of talent in my classmates.


That's about it for now, and you likely won't hear from me for awhile, since I don't get home until June, and then I've got three book chapters and one poster session to complete before July hits. I also had a conference presentation pitch that I made with a gaggle of other librarians picked up as a half-day preconference at one of the big librarian conferences (Internet Librarian 2008, in Monterey) picked up, so the fun never stops! For now, I need to go back and make margin comments in this batch of critical essays, and try to crank out some of the poems - or at least flesh out some of the ideas for poems - that have been growing in my head. Much love from a poetess steeped in her element...

Saturday, May 24, 2008

Update, Meme

Hey all! It's been quiet on my end for a number of reasons. I've been posting over at my other blog, Guardienne of the Tomes, and am currently in Louisville until June 1 for my residency for the MFA program. It'll be a wonderful but exhausting week of all things literary and artsy, and as an added bonus, I get to stay in the luxurious Brown Hotel, whose towels I want to steal (but won't, because my mom raised me better than that) because I've never met such lovely, absorbent towels. (And yes, I'm totally the one who turned one of them purple with my hair-dyeing yesterday. Sorry, y'all. If it makes you feel better, mom would be appalled.)


Just wanted to check in, let you all know that I am indeed still alive, and will likely have tons to post either after residency is done (they keep us pretty busy) or once I get back. However, my good friend over at PinkandChocolateBrown tagged me with a meme, so here goes:


1) What was I doing 10 years ago?


I had finished (or was finishing - our semesters ran late) my first year of college, and prepping for a summer of flipping burgers at the Dairy Queen off campus. Not glam, but I was thrilled at not having to go home, felt very independent to be doing my own thang.


2) What are 5 things on my to-do list for today (not in any particular order):


a) Go to Hotel fitness Center for workout. (Actually, this is already done, and I'm feeling pretty damned altruistic because I got up and went to the gym from 5am-6am on a Saturday morning. Guilt from the carrot cake I ate last night, that I'm pretty sure my trainer will see on my thighs when I return.


b) Get to the Lectorium early (7am) so I can snag a slot for a reading of my own work.


c) Attend Debra Kang Dean's poetry lecture at 11am.


d) Attend Sena Jeter Naslund's plenary craft lecture at 1:15pm.


e) Attend my daily workshop with Montana poet laureate Greg Pape.


4) Snacks I enjoy:


Hummus on pita chips or carrots, bananas, water with Lipiton green tea mandarin & mango flavor packets. (I know. Awful list. But I've done away with anything with high fructose corn syrup in it, and I hate to indulge after an asswhupping by my trainer, so, there you have it. I have been known to be easily seduced by dapper chocolate chip cookies, though.)


4) Things I would do if I were a billionaire:


Pay my mother's mortgage & other bills, pay down my student loans and credit card debt, take mom around the world on a nice leisurely trip to all the non-depressing spots (no Cambodia for me, Pico Iyer, thanks), and buy a house with a nice yard. And a delicious young man to mow it for me. The rest: savings, so I can afford to adopt a bunch of Chinese and Guatemalan babies.


5) Places I have lived:


BayShore, NY; Danville, KY; Atlanta, GA; Lexington, KY; Chattanooga, TN.


6)5 peeps I want to know more about:


Can God count as a peep? God, my mom, my dad, (um, my parents are alive. We just don't discuss our inner workings much), my maternal grandparents (I guess that counts as two, so that's five). Also, if anyone writes a *useful* handbook on men, I'd be all over that.


Your turn. if you read this blog, consider yourself memed!



7) I have been knitting:


Nothing, since I know not how to knit. But I'm crocheting a blanket for Beth, and for the impending birth of my Maziebird's boychild.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

Of Publishing and Eye Candy

Happiness is:


an envelope in the mail at the end of the day saying that one of my favorite poems was accepted for publication. "For my Unborn Son" will appear this time next year in Main Street Rag.


an email the day after that envelope in the mail, informing me that another poem has been accepted in another lit mag. "Visiting Cary" will be published in the next issue of Free Verse.


knowing that I'm doing something that will ultimately be good for me, in the form of delicious beefcake. Ahem. What I mean to say is that I bought not just a gym membership, but 12 sessions with a personal trainer. At 2 trainer sessions a week, and 2 weeks that I'll be gone for the MFA residency and then travel for work, that nearly takes me through the summer. Let's set aside the fact that I am paying some nubile young sexyman to scream at me and watch me flap my armfat until I can reach some semblance of fitness. Let's set aside the fact that this boy (he sounded very young on the phone) told me to make certain I eat before the workout tomorrow. (I figure along with caliper-ing my fat rolls, he's also going to measure how fierce my projectile vomit skills are.) Let's also set aside the fact that I feel absolutely ridonkulous going to a gym where I don't know how any of the torturous-looking machines work, and that I obviously look out of place in a building simply teeming with young blonde fit things, and hunky no-neck manthings. We can even set aside how pathetic it is that I have to pay someone to tell me what to do, since I'm more likely to exercise if it's structured as homework (with the supervisory training sessions like pop-quizzes with the teacher over my shoulder).


Hm. While we were overlooking all of that stuff, I forgot what we were supposed ot be looking at.


Anyway, I have 2 pairs of jeans that I could wear when I was at my most seriously ill, when I had a fab bod. (Not skinny-skinny - I've never gotten to the point that you can see my ribs. But hot woman fabulous.) Before I go to bed tonight, I will be hanging those jeans - and the killer-neckline top - on my bedroom door. And maybe (since there are two pairs) over the fridge.


I have the willpower to do (and enjoy) my job. I have the willpower to grind away at poetry manuscripts until I can't see. I have the willpower to pursue graduate work until my eyeballs want to bleed before reading more literature, and my hands want to fall off from the typing. So why is it so goddamned hard for me to step away from the burgers/ice cream/whatever? I find that most annoying.


Anyway. Yes. Publishing. Yee-haw. And with any luck, feeling better about my bod in just 2 short months. And by short, I mean hellaciously long and painful. But with eyecandy. Who will be screaming at me and cleaning my barf from his shoes, but eyecandy nonetheless.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Of Temptation and Used Book Stores

*sigh* I am now a slave to McKay's. I schlepped over another box of books I have no need for, and went browsing. And by browsing, I mean shamelessly stocking up on everything I wanted in anticipation of my trade-in credit.


I have been a collectress of cookbooks for a long time. I love to cook. And I love to cook big. My problem is that when I live by myself in an apartment with a practically-nonexistent kitchen, I don't cook. It just doesn't seem worth the effort just for myself. This has been disappointing on a number of levels, since I love being creative in the kitchen. It has also been one of a number of factors that has helped me put back on the 40 pounds I dropped back in the first half of 2007. grumble Anyway, most of my gourmet cookbooks don't help, nor does my propensity to cook for 10 people at once. So I picked up a few books on smaller dinners for two, and one-pot type recipes, since when cooking for one I can't be bothered to dirty up many dishes. Funny, because I *love* using up as many pots, pans, and other kitchen goodies when I'm whipping up something like Thanksgiving. So, I picked up the following form the cookery section:


Better Homes & Gardens Great Cooking for Two


Skinny Beef


Weekends are Entertaining: from Cocktail Parties and Brunches to Dinner for Two or Twenty


Crowd-Pleasing Potluck


One-Dish Dinners


The Everything One-Pot Cookbook


Casserole & One-Pot: Tasty Recipes for Every Day


Almost Vegetarian Entertaining


Jane Butel's Southwestern Kitchen


I am heartily impressed with the cookbook selection at McKay's, and am happily rooting through the remainder of my old books so that I can prep for my next visit.


I also acquired a number of books on writing, poetry, and general interesting stuffs:


Learning Irish by Michael O'Siadhail (I've been dying to learn Irish for forever)


The Great Thoughts by George Seldes (a collection of quotes)


Descriptionary: A Thematic Dictionary


The Cold of Poetry by Lyn Hejinian


Station Island by Seamus Heaney


Seamus Heaney: Selected Poems, 1966-1987


Her Blue Body Everything We Know by Alice Walker


There are Men Too Gentle to Live Among Wolves by James Kavanaugh


Dien Cai Dau by Yusef Komunyakaa


Edna St. Vincent Millay: Collected Sonnets


Borderlands/La Frontera: The New Mestiza by Gloria Anzaldua


Another Republic: 17 European and South American Writers Edited by Charles Simic and Mark Strand


Hunger's Table: Women, Food & Politics by Margaret Randall


Writing Poems, 5th ed. by Robert Wallace & Michelle Boisseau


In the Palm of Your Hand: The Poet's Portable Workshop by Steve Kowit


Beyond the Words: The Three Untapped Sources of Creative Fulfillment for Writers by Bonni Goldberg


Versos Sencillos/Simple Verses by Jose Marti


Bucolics by Maurice Manning


I'm particularly excited about Bucolics, which I have heard is fabulous. My MFA mentor from this past semester, Jeanie Thompson, write a really great review of it, and I've read excerpts from it. Because I am a fan of the short line and of an organic rhythm, I'm looking forward to digging into it. I wonder if I might be able to add it to my reading list for this next semester...I'm working on building a preliminary bibliography to pitch to whomever I get for my next mentor. I wonder if they'll mind that I hope to include Milosz, Heaney, Manning, Eliot, Komunyakaa, Eavan Boland, Pablo Neruda and William Carlos Williams. Do you think that's too schizo?

Saturday, April 26, 2008

Random Thoughts from the Poetess

A collection of random thoughts for your perusal:


I painted my toes for the first time this season and am breaking in new sandals, which has resulted in blisters on the tops of my feet. This is likely caused by the fact that my feet are spoiled by Danskos. *sigh* At least my ruby-tipped toes are cute. The color, by OPI nail lacquers, is "I'm Not Really A Waitress." Heh.


On the non-creative writing front, I'm trying to bang out a chapter titled "The Haves and the Have-Nots: Class, Race, Gender, Access to Computers and Academic Success" for a forthcoming book edited by Vib Bowman and Robert Lackie of the library and education world. I am excited about this for a number of reasons - first, um, it's a book chapter. A book with an ISBN. W00T! Looks good for tenure, and the book, which the editors have titled The Myths, Realities, and Practicalities of Working with Gen M: A Handbook for Educators and Librarians, is actually something I'm interested in - education and media literacy issues for Gen M kids. It's integrally related to my day job as a reference and instruction librarian. Plus, the publishing credit is something I can use in my bid for tenure, whereas my creative writing, not so much.


I am also kicking around a few ideas for books. Not that I have the time to write a scholarly-type book in my current state of OMGWTFBBQDEADLINES!!1!!!1!!eleven!!, but it is something I want to do eventually, so I'm considering what sort of topics would capture my interest for long enough to write an entire book. So far, I've got:


The "G" Spot: How Academic Librarians Affect Graduation Rates and Student Retention


Hey, I'd read that. It also might not be a bad start for a dissertation topic, given that I'm eyeballing starting the EdD program once I complete my MFA (November 2009) and MA (expected 2010). Best to have an interesting and useful academic library related topic.


I came into the office today to work on this book chapter, and haven't been able to rein in my brain to buckle down and do it. I have a sketch of the abstract, which is due to the editors Wednesday, so I do believe I'll be back in tomorrow to tackle it.


What is on my brain is this Lilith collection. (My brain has been usefully parsed into two parts: dayjob librarian work brain, and night-time and weekend creative writing brain. Apparently weekend brain is jealous of its space and wants little to do with librarian writing.) While reading my articles to form this book chapter, I was struck by the sudden desire to write in negative space and see if it turned into something compelling. I like it, but am sending it over to my trusty experimental fiction dude Drew, who is quite the poet himself and has some serious sense when it comes to revision suggestions. He's getting MFA-ed in May, so if you're hiring, you should contact him. Anyway, back to topic, Lilith on the brain, trying to keep it interesting, working in negative space from the starting thought of "I was never tempted by an apple." (That's not how it appears in the poem, but that's where the idea-seed came from - is it possible to write about not-something, and keep readers fascinated by all of the possibilities it leaves open? I think so, if it's done well, but it's a hell of a challenge.)


Also: more from me on the multiple-personality split of creative vs. not-creative writing. I hate to call it "uncreative" (and even "not-creative" is sort of insulting), and I don't want to call it "professional" writing, since a paid poet is a professional. I'll let this one marinate a bit and post on it soon.


Random: does it freak anyone else out that Firefox's spell-check suggestion for my mis-typed version of "something" is "thigbone's"? I mean, I wasn't really that far off, and it didn't look anything like "thighbone's"...

Thursday, April 24, 2008

A Series of Late Nights

It has been quite the interesting past few days. Oh, not from anyone else's viewpoint, I'm sure. For them, my life looks as dull as usual. Work, home, walking the dog, making dinner, turning on the tv and the laptop. All pretty ordinary. What is *not* ordinary is that I'm averaging 3 poems a day for the past, oh, eight days.


I'm not saying I'll keep them all. I think some of them are good, and some of them are ordinary and will have to be torn up and remade. The deluge is nice though - it's like trying to drink from a firehose, there's so much I want to write.


The result has been interesting. I compiled a full-length collection that had the theme of a daughter coming of age and dealing with her father, and I titled it Carving Your Name. Thrilled to have a complete book, I schlepped it off to about three competitions. Then, in a bit more than a weekend, I wrote a chapbook in Lilith's voice and titled it "I Will Not Lie Below," and sent that one out. I broke Carving Your Name into two chapbooks, one concentrating on seasonal themes called "Summers in Bay Shore," and one concentrating on the theme of coming to terms with grief titled "Carving Your Name." (I know, unoriginal of me to keep the same title as the full-length, but it tickled me and seemed right.)


That made me feel productive enough that I could forget my early-in-the-year dry spell. But that wasn't all. I decided that since there was such a heavy daughter/woman theme in Carving Your Name that I thought I might combine the more heavily femme-themed pieces with the Lilith chapbook, and I titled that full-length collection Disobedient Daughters. I farmed that one out to another four poetry book contests.


And then I decided there was too wide a gap between just the daughter pieces and the pieces that were overtly in Lilith's voice in Disobedient Daughters, and that Lilith really deserved her own book without my diluting it with poems that were really meant to go in a different direction. So I've been walking around in Lilith's crimson stiletto peep-toe pumps in my head at night (which is the footwear I imagine her enjoying), and her meager chapbook has grown to twenty-eight poems and counting, tentatively titled God in my Throat.. As I said before, not all of them are strong enough to stay, and they'll need revision and some slight reordering, but it's a project I'm enjoying.


Now I'm struggling to make sure the voice doesn't get stale. Trying for different angles, different approaches for the narrative, different images, trying not to let a vivid character fade to pale through too much retelling.


Finally, playing off an email I sent to a friend, I thought I'd put some of my more, um, interestingly-toned poems into a chapbook called "Muse Made Me Her Bitch." Struggling to fill it out, but in a good way, like stretching muscles I haven't used in too long. Sometimes I get dissatisfied when my tone becomes...not complacent, really, but not harsh and surprising enough to satisfy me. "Muse" gives me the outlet I need to experiment with some things.


And then there's "The House That Falls Down" (also occasionally titled "Warsongs"). It's a collection of poems on war broken into three sections - the war, the women, and the homecoming. I was going to write it off, but I have an affection for it - I wrote the bulk of it while my brother was a Marine deployed in Iraq and Afghanistan, and he said he liked the collection, and that the guys he shared it with enjoyed it. It came in as a semi-finalist in competition (though that could be due to a dearth of entries, I'm sure). It hands together oddly, every single piece needs severe revision, and war is a tough thing to write about and get right. I should trash it. But I'm keeping it. Selfish and sentimental, but whatever. it'll be my fixer-upper project.


In good news, I looked at the packet mailing schedule for my MFA program for the Spring 2008 semester (which starts at the end of May), and noted that it called for volunteers for folks for the full-manuscript workshop for the Spring 2009 residency. A few emails later, and I'm in! I'll likely be the only poetess in the group, since it's apparently the folks with novels who take advantage of that workshop, but hey. I write in the hopes that regular folks will enjoy my poems, and receiving critique from non-poets (or, as writers, merely poets of a different stripe) may actually be more helpful, since I'm getting accustomed to getting most of my critique from poets. Anyway, it can't hurt, and I can at least sound off of some people to see if they find it as interesting as I do. I'm afraid the folks that have read the bits I've shared may be biased because we're pals, though they've shared some good critiques. Heh, okay, I admit it. I wonder a little bit if walking in as the only poetry manuscript is like coming in as an underdog where it's more than likely that folks with actual coherent fiction and CNF stories will think that I'm inherently inferior because I work in smaller clips, and don't have their sort of stamina.


Okay, so I have a teensy inferiority complex. But I'm good humored about it. *grin*


Anyway, it's been a series of very late nights (particularly since I'm accustomed to going to bed at 10pm. Half past midnight makes morning an absolutely shitty time to be me, but I think it's worth it. Hell, I *know* it's worth it - I'd burn out terribly fast if I did my scholarly stuff both at work *and* at home, and I'm trying desperately to keep home as my creative sphere for personal work. Now what I wish I had was a group - one where we exchange manuscripts, make candid comments, and slug it out good naturedly surrounded by Kinko's-bound nearly-finished masterpieces and beer. Until then, though, I'll continue writing. And if you want to volunteer to make some margin-notes, I will snail-mail you a copy of whichever manuscript you're interested in *grin*. For now, though, I am going to bed.


Right after I finish a piece called "Witness."